(This blog post is also available as an MP3 audio file, which you will find at the bottom of this post!)
The other day, stuck in the belly of the New York City subway, I was struck by this all-to-often heard comment, “We are delayed because of train traffic ahead of us.“
This simple, but way overused phrase plugs right into our conditioning to blame something else for our current problem. It takes the responsibility off of us, and we can’t be blamed because “it’s not our fault”, and we step into our perceived state of powerlessness – believing we cannot change our current challenge, and so we sit, idly, complaining about our predicament, or believing we just have to put up with it because, “it is what it is.”
And, it’s so EASY to do! Blaming the boss, or the spouse, or the economy for your current plight makes you feel a lot better about your belief that you can’t do anything to change your circumstances. So, you sit there waiting, waiting WAITING for circumstances to change….days become weeks, which become years, by which point, you have now proven you are powerless to change your circumstances….
The subway is delayed because the transit system has a recurring issue they have failed to find a good solution to. Honestly, if you have the same problem, every day, and you blame proverbial “traffic”, your result will never change – you will always be stuck and delayed!
Blaming the problem for the problem, does not make a solution to it!
Unless you actually enjoy being stuck, and you do not want to change your circumstances, at some point, you have to stop playing the blame game, and step up to a new game – one where you are playing for different results in your life! The only way to believe that you have the power to change your circumstances is to take action. And, when you take action, and the results don’t happen right away, you have to have the courage to change the action, rather than use it to prove, yet again, that you are stuck in a situation you cannot change.
Here are a few tips on how to shift from being stuck in your life, to steering your life:
Stop blaming your circumstances on someone or something else. Start looking at what actions YOU are currently using over and over again that are not working for you.
Once you have a handle on what’s not working, think about how YOU can behave or act differently within your current area of frustration.
See what happens, when YOU behave differently. How does your behavior impact your challenge?
If it’s still not the result you want, figure out how to shift your action once again. If you shift your situation in the direction you want, YIPPPEE! Go celebrate the power you just stepped into to change your life!
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